Tuesday, January 06, 2009

His name is blessed

"I will cause my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the LORD, in your presence. I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion." - Exodus 33.19

I love to share the story of Ben over and over again. He is a living testimony of God's endless miracles. Seeing Ben grow up into a talented, intelligent boy, is a bonus many times over.  

Every year as we celebrate his birthday, I become emotional. Not that I love him more. Dick and I are equally blessed with the girls and we love the three of them not less than any other. The girls are as talented and lovable in different ways. But the birth of Ben was a turning point in my life, and maybe in my hubby's as well, in so many ways. 

The uncertainty of his survival becomes fresh every time he turns a year older. I can still picture Ben as the helpless tiny baby inside the incubator in the hospital's neonatal intensive care unit. His arms were just a little bigger than my thumb. Yet, each of his tiny hands and one of his foot had IV tubes. He had another IV on the head because the doctors couldn't find any suitable vein on his other foot. He was breathing only through a ventilator. They fed him my milk through a tube placed on his nostril.  

The day Ben went into cardiac arrest a few days after his birth was probably the worst day of my life. The days that followed, not knowing whether or not he would survive, were so agonizing. I would never want to go through it again and I wish no parent would go through such a painful wait.  

But looking back, that episode with Ben, prepared us for many difficult situations we would soon encounter, including Star's bleeding condition. Because we have seen God's faithfulness in the way He gave Ben to us, we managed to hurdle so many storms. God gave us not only a wonderful son, but a faith anchored on the truth -- that Jesus is a Living God. My prayer is that Ben will grow up not only into a real gentleman, but a man after God's own heart in every aspect of the word.  

READ: The birthing of Ben

(Photos: 1-month-old Ben shortly after he left the hospital. One-year-old Ben. 7-year-old Ben with me in a coverage in Baguio. And the handsome 14-year-old Ben.)